"Who can find a virtuous and capable wife?
She is more precious than rubies.
Her husband can trust her,
and she will greatly enrich his life.
She brings him good, not harm,
ALL the days of her life..." Proverbs 31:10-12.
I read (and by "read," I mean, truly understood)this passage when I was in 7th grade...Now I'm in college. Crazy crazy crazy.
I believe that the key to this passage is verse 12...
She brings him good, not harm,
ALL the days of her life...
It is easy to gloss over this verse and say, "Well, it's talking about being a wife...Therefore, we are to honor our husbands when we get married..."
Read it again:
She brings him good, not harm,
ALL the days of her life...
ALL the days of her life...That's every single day, including today and yesterday...
I want to honor my future husband all my life. He is going to be the one who leads me... loves me...supports me..treasures me...So, I want to respect him, build him up, encourage him to chase his dreams, love him, support him, etc. And I don't really want to start doing this when I meet him...I am his for life--even today.
So, about 6 years ago, I started praying for him, writing little notes to him and keeping them in a notebook that I will give him one day, etc... Which sounds completely crazy. But I do. Now that I am typing this out, it sounds embarrassing. Hahah. Welcome to my life. But I only tell you this because I think it is SOOO important... It keeps me so focused on Christ and how He has plans for me and how He is the ultimate bridegroom. It makes me see His love more and more...And I fall more in love with Him everyday... My relationship with Christ is always going to be here. It's the one thing that lasts and lasts and lasts...So, it will ALWAYS be my number one priority...It keeps me from giving me heart to just any boy, b/c my heart is Jesus' and then my future husband's...
To be honest, I am already SO committed to this guy that I don't even know...I mean, I don't even know his name, where he is, what he's doing, what his dreams and passions are, or anything. Haha. But I am committed to him by guarding my heart and praying for him on a daily basis...I'm not just talking about some surface bedtime prayers... I mean, "on my knees" prayers...I pray for that boy so often.
Sometimes the Holy Spirit just places him heavy on my heart, and I just pray it out... The thing is, he is going through stuff right now just like I am, and I want to be there supporting him even now. I want to be there for him, praying that he has the strength to run the race in front of him...
I want to encourage you to pray for your future husband/wife...Make a list of things that you believe are important to have in your spouse, and pray that Abba is molding him/her into those things (I'm not talking about physical characteristics)...Here are some things that I pray for on a daily-ish basis...and I pray that I develop these same characteristics...
*Keeps his eyes focused on Christ, even when life is hard...that he learns to follow Christ no matter what the cost.
*that he always puts Christ above me...that we will always center our relationship on HIM.
*that he becomes a man of integrity...that he always does what he says he will.
*that he is disciplined.
*that Abba places people around him to advise him, keep him accountable, love him, support him, make him laugh, etc.
*instills beliefs into others rather than enforcing them.
*digs into the Word...
*experiences success in whatever he does...but also that when he experiences failures, he grows from them.
*that he loves his family.
*lives the Gospel.
*speaks words filled with grace.
*sees best in people/positive attitude.
*hands free of controversy/slow to anger/quick to listen (1 Timothy 2:8--In every place of worship, I want men to pray with holy hands lifted up to God, free from anger and controversy.)
*passionate about life.
*gives the people around him room to be and the grace to become.
*lives in love.
*develops a selfless faith.
*Doesn't give up when things are hard.
*Knows what he believes (in terms of faith, politics, etc)
*A voice for those who can't speak for themselves (Prov. 31:8-9).
*A passion for orphans/adoption.
*loves kids and wants to invest in their lives...maybe help start some children's homes too...or an inner city mentoring type deal...Who knows? :)
*Full of smiles.
*Respects all women...Doesn't make fun of anyone about their appearance...Holds door open for all women, etc.
*Challenges people.
*Lives what he preaches.
*compassionate.
*tender-hearted.
*strong.
*Patient.
*Sees a need...Fills a need.
*A servant leader.
*Guards his mouth...
*Makes people laugh and smile.
*Guards his heart.
These are the same characteristics that I want to define who I am...
Make a list. Pray for your future husband/wife. Lift them up. Honor them now. Love them now.
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